I LOVE dispensing advice.
Good advice, bad advice, totally inane and/or irrelevant advice.
I love it.
I may not even be good at it, but it's fun. And it makes people think you're wise. People just accept all advice as having innate value. Mine doesn't. I have almost NO life experience. How the fuck could I be able to tell you how to deal with a breakup, when I've never even been in a couple? But people just nod thinkingly when I dispense random nonsense about what they should do with themselves. In the past few months, I've had two people comment to me that I seem to know so much, and give such good advice. I mean, what the fuck? People will buy anything these days.
I mean, I'm flattered that people respect my opinion. But simultaneously, I'm stupified by it. Perhaps it's because there are relatively few people who's opinions I give flying fuck about. I have to have a mild degree of respect for someone to even LISTEN to their opinion of me. But I guess I'm just a bitch.
But I do love giving advice.
You love life, you love all those around you and the world that you live in. You are happiest when you are doing something for someone else or for the common good of mankind.
I drank last night anyway. And with no adverse effects, I might add. But then I only had three. (give or take five) It was a relatively boring party, but everything becomes more bearable after a white russian, a black russian, two pina coladas and four strawberry daquiris (not in that order). The evening turned out ok, but I didn't stay very long. I'm ashamed to admit, but I went home at 11pm. I was pretty fucking tired. As soon as I got home, I went straight to bed, put on a cd and fell asleep before two tracks had played. Music is so much cooler when you're kind of sloshed. I get quite dizzy when I drink, and before I went to sleep, I sat up in bed to set up my discman, and as the music came on, it kind of passed over me like waves. It was one of the most amazing sensations I've ever felt. It was like I couldn't just HEAR the music, but FEEL it all through my body. Unfortunately I couldn't stay awake long enough to enjoy for more than a minute. But next time I drink, I'm totally taking my discman along.
In other news, I'm on holidays now! Which means I'm going to sleep in, stay up very late, and repeatedly tell myself that "I'll start studying tomorrow". And I intend to gate-crash the shithole that calls itself William Carey. It'll be so good to laugh at all the fucks there. And see Jenny. Yay for seeing Jenny!
Anyway, I'll probably come online again later tonight, so I might post again then. But it's unlikely.
caroline 19:31 [+] ...
:: Thursday, June 26, 2003 ::
pfft. New Blogger totally sucks testicles. It's ugly, it's impractical, it's annoying and it smells funny.
I HATE YOU NEW BLOGGER. YOU SUCK EVEN MORE THAN OLD BLOGGER! (and old blogger sucked a lot of arse too) GO AWAY. *cries* I hate you new blogger. I really do.
*hisses at "preview post" button* piece of shit.
caroline 22:35 [+] ...
:: Wednesday, June 25, 2003 ::
I wish that I'd hurry up and get better. I'm so tired of feeling sick. And I really don't want to miss the 18th on friday, I've been looking forward to it for ages. As it is, I probably won't be able to drink due to the cocktail of medications I'm on. At least there's the party on the 4th. I can get nicely toasted then.
Kitty's Guide to Blogs, Part 2 Know your audience.
All blogs are written for an audience, be it large or small. Here are the four basic categories of blogs:
1. The unlimited audience blog. This blog is written with the knowledge that anyone in the world can read it, and the posts are constructed with the intent of entertaining the readers. These blogs are more often social or political commentaries, rather than prsonal diaries.
2.The friends as audience blog This one is more personal than #1, but still doesn't deal with intensely personal issues. These blogs are often like general open letters to inform their friends what's been happening in their life.
3. The random strangers as audience blog These are the most personal of those already listed, and aren't shown to the author's friends or anyone they know. However, they're written with the knowledge that random people they'll never meet, might read it.
4. The no-audience blog. Only morons have no-audience blogs. These aren't able to be accessed by strangers or friends alike. Basically the people who write these should just stick to writing a diary on paper and hiding it under the bed. It's more suited to their kind of entries.
The obvious danger of all blogs is the shit-hitting-fan factor. People can get awfully shitty when they're insulted on a blog. So you either have to be careful what and how you say things, or adopt a nifty "I don't give a fuck" attitude. It's always worked for me. :)
i'm so tired of being here
suppressed by all of my childish fears
and if you have to leave
i wish that you would just leave
because your presence still lingers here
and it won't leave me alone
these wounds won't seem to heal
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase
when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears
when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears
and i've held your hand through all of these years
but you still have all of me
you used to captivate me
by your resonating light
but now i'm bound by the life you left behind
your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
your voice it chased away all the sanity in me
these wounds won't seem to heal
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase
when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears
when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears
and i've held your hand through all of these years
but you still have all of me
i've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
and though you're still with me
i've been alone all along
Do you know what REALLY shits me? When people so blindly and obliviously hurt the people around them. How can a person cause so much pain, and ignore the fact they're doing it? I'm amazed at their complete and utter inability to see past their own self-pity. I mean, fuck! When you cause pain to another person, usually YOU apologise, not whinge until they are forced to. The victim should not be made to feel like they are at fault. It's just wrong.
Stop toying with people's hearts and their insecurities. Have some fucking compassion. I doubt you're even reading this, but if you are, I hope you fucking listen. And I hope you feel fucking bad, just like you've made everyone else feel. It's only fair. I am sick of watching you play with other people's lives like they're your Sims or something. They aren't. Stop acting like you're the only person who exists.
hmm, it seems I got angry again. Oh well. It was for a worthy cause.
>this will not be deleted. this will not be amended. this will not be apologised for. this will not be explained or justified. this IS an attack. I mean every word.I hope it gets to you. END<
Ugh. I was so worked up this afternoon. A complete and utter emotional basketcase. I blushed solidly for several hours. I got all angry, and from then on I was screwed. Hmmf. I just lost all impetus to write. Fuck it.
caroline 19:53 [+] ...
:: Monday, June 16, 2003 ::
Today is the first time I've really felt the need to write something on my blog, and not been able to because I don't want certain people to read it. I don't like self-censorship, I don't usually do it, but this is a special case. I feel so... conflicted. My thoughts are all contradictory. Fuck 'em.
I'm trying so hard to ignore all the assessments piling up. *shuts eyes and covers ears* Much better.
The laws of blogging:
-Never delete posts. Just don't.
-Only edit posts to correct grammatical or spelling errors.
-Don't apologise for your posts, or what you say in them. You shouldn't apologise for speaking your mind. If they care about you and/or understand the concept of a blog, they'll forgive you. If they can't forgive you, they aren't worth it.
-Don't use names. It makes it too personal, and more confusing for random readers.
-When you mention a person who has a blog by name, make their name inot a link to their site. (that is, if you have permission to)
-Not posting at all is preferable to posting "i have nothing to say. the end"
Always so damn BORED. It's a chronic condition. Bored. Bored. Bored. And unimaginative. I have nothing to say. Absolutely fucking nothing to say. I don't even know why I'm still typing. Actually, yes I do. Jenny. Evil wench. She made me. *cries*
But yeah. I'm going to be happy anyway. I want a cute little personification of happy just like Jenny. I think it should be blue and furry, with occasional splashes of glitter. Yeah. I'm insane. But you all knew that. I'm seriously struggling with finding something to say.
I stayed home sick from school today. Which means I don't even have any goss. Although Chris mentioned something to do with Rob and Tim. I wonder if it's similar to what Erin said about those two yesterday. hmm. It doesn't really bear thinking too much about. Total squickage.
Maybe I'll write more later. Pfft
caroline 18:43 [+] ...
:: Wednesday, June 11, 2003 ::
I'm really bored and boring today. So I apologize in advance to my meagre and unfortunate audience for this crappy post.
Although, I do have two eighteenth partys to look forward to in the next month or so. And both of them are piss-ups. (such is the usual nature of 18ths I gather.) And at both of them there will be new people. It's been so long since I've socialised outside of school. I have no life :) Woe is me. But yeah. Appparently there'll be cocktails at the first one, so I might take some Baileys and Butterscotch Schnapps to make cocksucking cowboys. They're fucking yummy. You just don't let yourself get a mental image of the name.
You know what? I've decided, much like Jenny, that I'm going to be happy. HAPPY. Fuck the HSC. I'll get the shit done. I'll finish. ANd then it'll all be over, and I can get sloshed for a few weeks. And then I can go to uni, and do something I actually want to do. And it will rock. But the rest of this year will rock too. I'm not going to let myself get stressed. I'm going to actaully work, a little, and study, and actually attend maths, and do a not half-arsed job of my assessments, AND I'm going to have fun. Because I want to, and therefore I will. Go me!
I'm supposed to write a long, interesting, entertaining post.
HAH!
I'm sort of down lately. Just not impressed by anything, or interested in anything. I'm back to loathing school in a big way. I'm doing really borign topics in almost all my subjects at the moment, and it just makes it so hard to get up int he morning. and the shitty weather and sore ankles don't help either. Stupid winter. It fucking sucks. *kills winter* I think the only reason I'm not a crumpled up mess (like all my clothes :P) is because I'm constantly thinking and dreaming about spring, and the freedom and warmth that will arrive with it. Spring is when everything happens. It's when the flowers come out, it's when I turn 18, it's when the HSC finishes it's evil reign over my life, and when I get to go on schoolies.*pines for spring*
blogger is a piece of shit // Saturday, June 7th 2003 @ 11:49pm
Last night achieved a high level of ass-kickingness. It was mad. A group of my friends and I went to our usual chinese restaurant, and stayed around to witness the karoake. It's always amusing watching people sell their dignity so cheaply. Of course it's amusing watching my friends do it too. (they didn't have any dignity in the first place) But it was a lot of fun. And no, I didn't sing. I never do. I've not yet been that drunk. Maybe I never will. *shrugs*
Today was pretty nice too. I went up to the Blue Mountains with my parents. It was just pleasant, despite the freezing cold. It's such a beautiful area. When I grow up (lol) I want to have a house up in the mountains. All my life I've felt that the ideal was to have three houses. One in the city/suburbs, one at the beach, and one in the mountains. That's what my grandfather had, and I guess because of that, I just see it as how things should be. lol, I'm going to have to marry rich though. There's no way I'll ver be able to afford three houses on my own. *shrugs* I'm sure it'd be so traumatic marryiing someone rich. lol.
Uggh. I'm even more crippled than I was before. Yesterday I stacked walking down the aisle of the bus. Unlike the last time I hurt my ankle (which hadn't healed yet), this time, BOTH of my ankles rolled out and collapsed. Fun. SO now they're both sprained, and I walk vaguely like a penguin, because I can't decide which ankle to favour. *grumbles* Like, ow. :( (sorry, I just had to insert that random skank-speak bit. I've been tainted by the company I keep)
Sorry for this pissy post, and the lack of posts whatsoever in recent times. But life sucks. Get over it.
I took the Inner Dragon online quiz and found out I am a Copper Dragon on the inside. My Inner Dragon is the mighty warrior of dragon-kind. It's just that simple. Coppers show up when someone's about to die. Coppers don't mess around, and they don't play evil games like Red Dragons. They don't bother with magic, like Gold Dragons. They exist for a purpose, and they serve it well.
But what sort of a dragon would I be if that really was the whole story? I also like to stomp my enemies, start the occasional war, and spend lazy hours preening my battle aura. My favorable attributes are strength, physical abilities, thriftiness, warmth, and longevity in battle. Just in case some puny human (or conniving Red Dragon) thinks they can get the drop on me, I've got a concealed breath weapon - gigantic masses of Fire. Hey, it's the tried and true way to cook a cow in 0.75 seconds.
I decided that today is show-and-tell day. This is the book I learnt to read on, when I was four years old. It's so damn cool. I'll give you an excerpt, for your reading pleasure.
"Three little bears.
One with a light.
One with a stick.
And one with the shivers."
It's truly a literary masterpiece, is it not? i thought you'd agree.
If you hadn't already guessed, I'm bored and i have nothign to say. More tomorrow, I promise.
